White House Coronavirus Press Briefing (Probably)

The podium buzzes with people. Dr. Fauci and Dr. Birx shuffle about, while Vice President Pence touches his nose and mouth, before shaking hands with four people in flight suits. We wait for President Trump to take the podium. President Trump enters from the left, shaking hands with everyone on stage. He begins reading prepared[read more]

The Narrative of right-wing media: It’s wrestling, basically

Professional wrestling is professional, but it’s only “wrestling” in the sense that it mimes wrestling. Wrestling, as you would define it as a scholastic or Olympic sport, makes for poor television. (With exceptions for stories like Anthony Robles, the one-legged wrestler. That was fuckin’ awesome.) Bob Costas does an admirable job trying to make the[read more]

There is no “going back to normal” after this. Things will never be the same.

It all does feel like a scene from a Michael Bay film, doesn’t it? A typecast news anchor-woman in a responsible blazer flashes across our screen, her muted voice playing in the background. “Scientists are rushing to find a cure for the vaccine, but experts say it could be over a year away.” Will Smith[read more]

Here’s the reality of how clicks work: You need me.

I found out that “.sucks” is a domain suffix you can own, so I figured I might as well embrace the fact that I must suck. Because according to the clickbait overlords of the internet — I do suck. However, I suck in a way that makes me indispensable to the internet. If you’re not[read more]